I feel....sad & disappointed to myself

I feel kinda sad n disappointed to myself....as what my wife told me that i complaint too much about everything. Even a simply task i even complaint it. Now i know why I dont get anything I ever wanted because i have failed to do such simple task. I should have done anything without any complaint and I should done it in better ways. My wife told me that God given task to everyone from simple to hardest task. And, i think i got stuck on simplest task ever and im not able to get up at all even i cant get this simplest task done without any complaints. God TRUELY is POWERFUL. He taught me yet I failed Him. I wanna cry out yet I cant. All I feel now is pain. Not those heartbreaking pain. It cant even compare to what I feel right now. I write this post is to relief myself n tell the world who believe in God so that we should never abandon Him when we get something we truely need or something we wanted for so long.

Sometimes I've been thinking why do we pray? To get something we wanted or to be forgiven for all the sins we commited? I admit I asked too much from God and yet I get nothing...and that time I dont understand why. Now I understand. Im glad I have a wife who really knows well about God. To tell everyone the truth...I dont really believe in religion. If religion so good...why are humans in this world still fight among each other? Why hate each other yet we are brothers and sisters in God? Most people believe in religion yet dont believe in God? Why so much rules in religion yet God Himself never taught us all that? I just dont understand about rules in religion and it get stricter and stricter every year. Its just....well....human-like. Its like all the rules that have in different religion made from human not God. So weird and get more complicated every time. And sometimes I lost my respect in religion because of the rules that get stricter every time. Sometimes I think it doesnt make sense at all. And YES I am complaining right now. Thats what I hate about myself most of the time. Aaarrgghh!

Sigh~ so pain....Im totally confused about my life right now. All i can think of is to get better salary job and yet none replied. I cant accept RM450/monthly now. I have a wife n daughter to take care. Government should have taken care of minimum salary for East Malaysia. It should be done YEARRRSSSS ago and yet none is approve. If I have given chance to change my beloved North of Borneo. I would change everything I could. I dare say most of leaders are blinded by wealth n power. Its hard to say corrupted because I still believe some of them dont have a choice but to obey.

Well than thats it. Im out of my own thoughts.

Thank you for reading.

I need TRUE businessman mentor!

aaaahhh man....I really need a TRUE businessman mentor who willing to teach me everything in business. I wanna learn TRUE business not some shyt. Everytime and most of people i meet before said the same thing to me "This is the only way for u in business...no others". WTF there should be a lot more skills, ideas, strategies and etc to do certain business. There should be ALWAYS a backup plan. Impossible there is only one way to do business? =_=" and some more...some people try to take advantages on me. Give shyt ideas and even ask me to work for them while teaching me. LOL in my experiences...there wont be a "TEACHING LESSONS" if when work for people who tell me to work for them while teaching me business. Do you really think you have time to teach people about business you do? Thats just impossible. I would say a businessman will focus on their business rather than teaching their workers how to do business. That would be a huge LOL if there are businessman out there teaching their workers how to do business for their own. No bosses out there want their best man to quit working for them. LoL...I always experiences this. I do my works seriously and as professional as possible but the boss just always treat me bads. I meet a very good boss before but that time I follow people to hate the boss. I got influenced. DAMN IM SO F*CKING SORRY to the good boss. He treat me so good but I dint. Well maybe thats my punishment by GOD. >_< painful punishment from GOD for treating my good boss badly last time.

So now I need a mentor~ to be successful businessman. Dont tell me direct selling and MLM is the only way to be better in business. I know those 2 are one of the basics but why cant tell me others? Direct sellling and MLM are NOT own business. There are WORKING for the company. I dont understand why most people dont understand about it. To be suffering and work so so hard for the company by direct selling and MLM. Its not even OWN business. LOL...weird. Some people said to me that direct selling and MLM is the only way to earn a lot money. In my mind "yes it does but...you still work for others". I would rather work a certain company that gives me RM1500/monthly than go here and there...do demos...suffering so much to sell certain things that some people dont need it. If people said to me this direct selling and MLM is best to learn business. YES i truely accept that. I dont mind to learn it but I WAS an EX-MEMBER of Amway & Elken. So I know that already. So maybe others would suits me well but most people always said if I cant do good in direct selling and MLM then I cant do business. Wut? seriously? Thats the only way to be better in business? You are F*CKING kidding me. =_="...I read a book called RICH DAD, POOR DAD...and it never says there is only one way to be better in business. Its not a question of "what should I do?" but a question of "how should I do?" LOL sometimes I wish I could learn from Robert Kyosaki the writer of Rich Dad Poor Dad book. TRUELY I'll be honored if I could just get his signatures. =D hehehehe

Aaaand YEAH..I think thats it. My mind kinda blank right now because my daughter awake and crying. Too much play I guess or something. LoL Thank You for reading this post.

PEACE & LOVE.

Feel a bit down...

Well...I feel a bit down to think back what had happen to my friend and i. We worked in this company for more than 6 months and we dint get paid for 3 months ago. The boss called us and had a talk and you know what? The boss said he no longer able to pay our salary and would do a loan and give some money for us to play forex for him and profits will be divided by 50/50. I was like...wut? what about our salary? pay us! and yet waited for 1 month for that (what had our boss discuss and nothing improve). So after the discussion my friend and i had a little chat in our rest time. I said to him if our boss no longer able to pay our salary. How do we continue to work for him? Should we continue? We dint sign any agreement too. How about let just leave and find new job? My friend agreed in disappointment. We been trying to help the company actually but every result leads to disappointment. I just cant let go this matter easily. Discussion already made a lot a lot a lot of times but there is no improvement at all and we even get worst treatment. Sigh~~~ free work for whole 4 months. No salary. Asked to do forex trading and profits divided 50/50? Seriously? I could even make more profits using USD50. I know money management, strategies, more patient, POSSIBLE daily targets, and never ever push ourselves in forex. Even though we could 24/5 in forex but pushing ourselves will only leads to greed of money and when this happen. Easily lose temper, give up on trades, become more lazy, and etc. Here a one of my tips : lets say your modals are USD50. Make your daily target at USD10 and when you reach it...STOP! I know you could do more but its better to stop. Why? because you will become more greedy. SET your daily target and never go more or you will lose more...TRUST ME on this. Be thankful if you could make it till USD10 daily because with USD50 the value and lot are so limited unless you want to reach margin call faster.

Anyway from the day i stop working at previous company until now i still feel so down about it. 3 months no salary and 1 months given chance. Still no improvement. Come on! My salary so small only RM400/monthly! Damn it...so frustrated and disappointed. My friend tell me not to think about it but...that sad memory like haunting me. I really do need that salary for my wife and my daughter. Buy foods, drinks and even clothes. I do have my family support. My parents help me to buy important things but.......sigh~ im the one should be more responsible for all that things but...sigh~ I really dont know what should i do with no salary. I wanna say bad luck also cant. Keep getting FAKE promises. And the boss keep calling me to work for him and help him do his forex. DUDE! NO Idiots would work for free! I already cover your mistakes, cover how you treated us, cover everything and this is I get? Everyone has a limit. So this is my limit. The time you discuss us about you can no longer able to pay our salary I already decided to stop working for you. So K-THKS-BYE!

End...well I still looking for better jobs with higher salary but its so hard with no certain knowledge about some works. T-T so sad~ I only know cooking and computers but basic so F*CKING DAMN LOW! RM350 basic! My cooking skills can open a new business and yet basic salary only that? man....Malaysia Sucks. If I have higher chance to start a NEW LIFE in New Zealand, Swiszerland, Singapore, or West Australia. I would definitely go together with my family. >.<

Depressed

I feel soooooo depressed...sigh why am I easily get cheated by people? why am I get all this? When I want to put money in bank. One of the staff introduce me about Bijak Malaysia. She explained it to me that this Bijak Malaysia is same like simpanan. But u know what? ITS NOT! Its an insurance! Come on! If I want insurance I go for something much more better. But this only give amount of below RM30k. What the F*ck! So low! Aaarrgghh damn it I've been CHEATED! And another thing is this Score A i-teacher. LooooooL! I pay for delivery fee and it sent to the K-office and I have to go to that place to take all the stuffs. What the F*ck! Again I've been CHEATED! Come on man....Pay delivery fee and sent to K-office? So I write down my address. Cant it mail directed to the place I live? And I pay for the training fee and HAVE TO PAY again for the entrance fee? Isnt this is juuuuuust great? CHEATED all the time and its involve money.


Sigh...........All my money...........boom! Gone just like that...........oh well..............whats done is done. Cant do anything about it. Sigh......

Donation Button Added

I have add my donation button. The reason im doing this is that...I need HELP to clear my debts. Once Im done with my debts. I still would need HELP for my 3D graphic design computer and the expensive InteriCAD 7000 software. Those things are so damn expensive. No wonder 3D things are expensive. Anyway...I hope there are people out there who WILLING to help me with my problems. Well let me tell you all the reasons im doing this kind of things.

1) Im a COOK specialize in Western Foods & Chinese Dim Sum. So I know well how to design a kitchen for western foods or chinese dim sum. I could even combine both method into one but this would eat a lot of spaces.

2) Im very interested in 3D graphic design. It may sound crazy but hey why not right? I watch the show called "Restaurant Makeover"...they can do it so am I. I could design a whole restaurant. KopiTiam with dinning feeling, Cafe that feels like a pub, Cafe with certain theme, and etc. The only problem is i still dont know how to make proper budget for each designs. Because everything economic...people want cheap stuffs. I cant just make like $10000 for Cafe that looks like a club. Most of the items are custom made. Know what I mean?

3) 3D graphic design is the TREND now. In the future everything would be 3D. Most of the movies are in 3D graphics. Some movies are remake to make it in HD 3D. Thats easy all you need is do some rendering then your old movies become 3D. You know render farm right?

4) It may sounds that Im doing this for myself but the truth is...Im having hard time to look a better job out there because of my qualification. I know I could go work in cafes & hotels. In my country...the salary all damn low and it takes almost 2 years to become FULL TIME in hotels. Means that you starts as part time permanent with a salary of RM450 @ $150 a month. COME ONE seriously? Working hard for 9 hours and only gets that amount? Thats insane. I have a beautiful daughter to take care. My family have huge debts on waist too. How am I going to help?

5) IF I cant be 3D artist. At least people around the world be so kind to donate me some modal for my own cafe with a theme. Im not going to tell my theme because I dont want other people to do it before me. In my country....NO cafes, restaurants or hotels that have a theme. Everything about delicious foods, good feelings, and etc. I can do better than that.

There are more but....im almost late to go to work in computer shop. Computer Shop? Yes. Im a computer technician in training. I still need to know more about this technology. Also BIG THANKS to my senior. He taught me a lot without anything in return. He even tells me some tips. XD hehehe

Well then thats it. Thanks for taking your time to read my posts in this blog. I do have other blogs. Feel free to steps inside and look around. =) May God Bless You.

I feel so DOWN...

I feel so down these days because of a "GUY A" who i NEVER ask help before keep telling me for pay back because he thought he helped me. Actually the "GUY B" the one who struggle to helped me get 1 item from USA. This "GUY B" who helped me only ask this "GUY A" for transportation. I dint know this "GUY B" dont have transport until he told me. Well this "GUY A" only know about what happen between this "GUY B" and me that day when this "GUY B" want to deliver the item to me. For REAL...if "GUY B" want me to help him and ask for something return, I would love to because he helped me. BUT WHY THE HELL THIS FUCKING "GUY A" WANT A FUCKING PETROL FEE? WTF....taking advantages on me! I even charge me 1 dozen of egg tarts per day if i dont repay his so fucking called "debt". I NEVER ASK YOUR FUCKING HELP DUDE! I only ask help from "GUY B"! If he want help from me...I will not hesitate and help him back. Even you could say "Im just playing". DUDE! Thats FUCKING ANNOYING when people keep telling me for dozens of egg tarts everyday? You SHOULD know and UNDERSTAND every person in this world have their patient LIMIT! DUDE! PLEASE! YOU ARE 30 YEARS OLD! YOU SHOULD BE MORE UNDERSTAND ABOUT US WHO YOUNGER THAN YOU AND YET YOU ACTING LIKE "AH LONG" aka "LOAN SHARK"? I ALREADY REACH MY LIMIT DUDE! YOU ONLY GOT 3 DAYS TO STOP DOING THAT OR I WILL MAKE A POLICE REPORT FOR THREATENING ME! I DONT FUCKING CARE YOU GOT HELP ME OR NOT! YOU ALREADY OUT FROM MY FRIEND LIST FOR ACTING LIKE THIS! ITS "GUY B" THE ONE WHO HELP ME NOT YOU! 3 DAYS! STOP OR POLICE REPORT!


Uuuuuurrrggghhh! I want to do something right but always ends up doing something wrong. I just want PEACE but WHY THE HELL PEOPLE LIKE TO BULLY ME? Because im small? Because im young? Because im stupid? IM TRYING SO HARD NOT TO SETTLE THING VIOLENTLY! I COULD DO THE HARD WAY! I COULD EVEN DO THE EVIL WAY! Which do you prefer? I will definitely choose the EVIL WAY to teach you more lessons.


Dear God, Help me. I DONT want things end up badly. I WANT PEACE. Thats all I want. I DONT want war. I DONT want to lose another friend but sometimes "friend" is the one who always backstab another friend because "this kind of friend" always have chances to hit our back without even notice.


Sigh~ Im trying so hard already. I keep telling myself DONT do either choices. All I want is just let it go but I cant. Seriously who can hold on that everyday being ask for debts and "GUY A" even act like "AH LONG" aka "LOAN SHARK"? Im tired man...even I pay for it. I know well about "AH LONG" aka "LOAN SHARK" people. They will keep coming even debts are settle. Thats HOW they keep their "RICH" title.

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